December 14, 2008

Bush League

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So I have not really trash talked the yewts in depth this year, because I honestly feel it is a waste of my time, and mostly self explanatory. However, I had to say something about one of the lamest acts I have ever seen in a sporting event.

In utah’s game last night against Oklahoma the joke named luka drca blatantly tripped one of the Oklahoma players. They were jawing a little bit as they started going down the court, but then being the coward that he is he kicked the other guy’s foot, tripping him. It is something you could see in any elementary school hallway without even looking hard.

I realize that the yewts suck this year, more than I can ever remember them sucking, but this was pathetic. Maybe he was just taking a cheap shot at Oklahoma because he feels the football team got robbed, but we all know that is not the case.

I am not one for blowing things out of proportion, but he really should be suspended for a game if you ask me. People do stupid things on the court all the time where they get technicals and that is sufficient, but this was a blatant shot that could have seriously injured the other guy.

Lets just hope they don’t pull some stupid crap like that when they play us.

In closing, congrats BYU on remaining undefeated, this season just looks more and more promising every week. Go Cougars!

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October 14, 2008

GO RAMS!

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I just spent most of the day filling out application papers so I needed to write something that I really didn’t need to think about very much. In true BYU fan style i will simply write: Go CSU!

And just to answer Gene Menez of SI’s question on his heisman candidate article, yes Austin Collie is always open down the right sideline if you have any doubt, go to the film from the Utah game last year, I am sure most yewt fans remember it.

October 2, 2008

Utah vs. Oregon State – Rules for BYU Fans

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In all of my reading of CougarBoard, the best BYU/Yewt post I’ve ever read has to be the following rules posted by IndyCoug.

1. No BYU fan should ever root for Utah. Period. There are 7 other conference members BYU fans can root for if they are truly concerned about SOS or the national profile of the MWC. It’s mathematically impossible for all 9 teams to be great each year, so there’s no shame, nay, it is even commendable to root for Utah to reside in that mathematically necessitated cellar-dweller position.

2. If BYU needs Utah to win a game in order for BYU to secure a conference title, BYU fans should not root for Utah, but merely against the team they are playing. Keep Utah out of the equation as much as possible.

3. BYU fans should not discuss the upcoming Utah football game more than their own upcoming football game (like this week on Cougarboard). Utah shouldn’t be a main topic of conversation. It should primarily reside in a dark, unspoken realm of disdain.

4. The only time Utah should emerge from a BYU fan’s dark, unspoken realm of disdain is when Utah loses. Only then is it permissible to briefly discuss the Ute’s sucking and discuss the manifold benefits of schadenfreude. Afterwards, the conversation about the Utes should be backburnered until their next loss.

5. Any time a Utah football player is particularly good (Alexis Smith, Widdle Weddle), no BYU fan should feel compelled or obligated to admit such, give credit to or show unabashed admiration towards. If you can’t say something bad about them, then say nothing at all. Please refer to points #3 and #4 if you’re confused about this.

If you have a problem with the above points, then maybe you need to take up a different team as your favorite collegiate team and dispense with the charade of claiming you’re a BYU fan.

I’m sure that many will be feeling the twisted emotion tonight when the Yewts face Oregon State. I believe tonight’s game fits with IndyCoug’s rule #2 above. We can certainly root against Oregon State.

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November 22, 2007

A Little Reminder of Last Year’s BYU vs. Utah

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Need I say more?!

August 31, 2007

Highlight Video for Ute Haters

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Here’s a great video for every BYU fan that hates the Yewts(sorry didn’t want to be redundant). I think last night’s Utah game against Oregon State will be in the next version of the video.

November 29, 2006

BYU vs. Utah Highlight Videos

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I should have posted these a while ago, but it’s worth looking at again. Just watching it makes me want to call me Ute loving Uncle. I’ll embed the Google video of BYU vs. Utah highlights. Below that is a link to a high quality stream of the same video.

High Quality Stream of BYU vs Utah Video Highlights

I love the Rudy music!!

Thank you Harline!!

Johny Harline Making the Final Catch

November 22, 2006

A Little Ute Trash Talk

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I’ve been playing Fantasy Football with my friends I worked with at BYU and one of them posted a few comments that I thought were worth sharing. It’s in the context of Fantasy Football, but I think you’ll get the point.

I have to admit, I’ll be glued to the internet next Sunday watching the fantasy matchup of the year between Turfbiters and Flamingidiots. This is on par with Ohio State vs. Michigan, Ali vs. Frazier, you get the picture. Why, it’ll be bigger than the BYU vs. Scum of the Earth game next week….k, actually, strike that. Probably not, and I doubht I’ll be worrying about anything in fantasy football other than making the playoffs. But even that won’t matter if we beat the Pukes from up North. One thing we all have in common is Blue blood, and All I can say is FOUR years of incessant red yapping is enough. We need to destroy, maim, and mutilate those pansies. Conference Title is sweet, but what’s a cake without the icing. The other team in the state of Utah needs to go down, and go down hard. Best, most classic good vs. evil, Middle Class vs. Trailer Trash, Blue vs. red matchup next week. Scoreboard.

Thanks Scott!!

November 21, 2006

Must Beat Utah

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I don’t know about the rest of you out there, but I found the New Mexico game quite boring. Sure, it’s nice to have BYU go undefeated at home. It’s really great to win the Mountain West Conference outright and to do it the second to last game of the season. I also really like that BYU got invited to the Las Vegas Bowl. It’s a great venue and about 3 minutes from my house. Yes, I’m biased, but that’s ok. Despite all of these factors the New Mexico game was boring.

Let’s be honest, last week all that any BYU fan really wanted to do was look ahead a week to the Utah game. BYU’s lost to Utah 4 years running and it’s time for BYU to annihilate Utah. I don’t want to see a close game. I don’t want to see BYU take it easy. I want the full on BYU offense taking it to Utah. I want John Beck throwing for 400 yards. I want Curtis Brown and Fui Vakapuna (I’m too lazy to look up the right spelling so I hope that’s right) to run for a couple hundred yards. Who doesn’t love when Tonga runs over players?

The thing I want most if to be able to call my Uncle and congratulate his Utes on losing. Is that too much to ask for?

September 8, 2006

BYU Football’s Email to BYU Alumni

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Today I received an email with the subject: “BYU – Mountain West Conference Broadcast”

Sounded interesting. Well, it then said:

Dear BYU and Utah Alumni and Friends:

As rivals on the field, it is not very often where the Utes and Cougars join
athletic forces, but that is exactly what we are doing as we rally our alumni
and friends on a cause that is extremely important to the success of both
institutions.

What is BYU sports marketing thinking? If you want to petition support from BYU alumni you shouldn’t mention anything about Utah. Just tell BYU alumni that you need help. Mentioning Utah needs to do the same for us to really get the Mountain West Conference Games on Cable TV doesn’t do anything but hurt the process. Seriously, what were they thinking?

Here’s the full email for those that are interested. Getting the Mountain West Conference and the mtn. on TV really is a pretty big deal and something that should be supported. However, helping the Utes be on TV has NOTHING to do with it.

Dear BYU and Utah Alumni and Friends:

As rivals on the field, it is not very often where the Utes and Cougars join
athletic forces, but that is exactly what we are doing as we rally our alumni
and friends on a cause that is extremely important to the success of both
institutions.

Many of you know the Mountain West Conference recently entered into a new,
ground breaking television partnership with CSTV and Comcast. This partnership
has lead to the creation of the mtn. — the first television network devoted to
an athletic conference.

Nearly two months ago, Comcast and CSTV announced a new partnership and
distribution agreement. We were excited to see Comcast, as well as other
independent cable companies across the Wasatch Front, add the mtn. and CSTV to
their programming.

CSTV and the MWC are now in difficult negotiations with satellite television
providers to make the mtn. available to its subscribers. Many of our alumni and
supporters live outside the Intermountain West and broadcast options such as
satellite, on demand, and Internet broadcasts are very important. It is
imperative that we establish coverage on satellite and various new mediums.

As we entered negotiations with Dish Network and DirecTV, CSTV anticipated a
tough, drawn-out process. Negotiations have been ongoing for months. Broadcast
deals are complicated and take time; however, CSTV will continue to work
tirelessly until a satellite distribution deal has been finalized.

With our first games on the mtn. approaching, we’ve received hundreds of emails,
phone calls and letters from our fans. Many have wondered what to do. Most
have asked “how do I get Utah, or BYU on television?” Others have wondered how
they can help.

Our message is, you can help. You can make a difference in these negotiations.
In recent conversations with the MWC and CSTV we learned the satellite companies
have questioned the degree of interest by our fans in our television product.
As alumni and supporters of our two institutions, you have the power to affect
the outcome of the negotiations.

We need your help. If you live in an area where your only option for getting
the mtn is through satellite distribution, we need you to contact the satellite
companies. Let them know you are interested in satellite if they add the mtn.
If you already subscribe to Dish or DirecTV, please contact the company and tell
them you want the mtn.

Listed below are several ways to contact the satellite companies. Please make
an effort to call, email or write. It is imperative the satellite companies
hear from you, the consumer.

DirecTV
1-800-824-9081 (existing customers)
1-888-238-7177 (new customers)
directvcustomercare@directv.com
www.directv.com/DTVAPP/global/contentPage.jsp?assetId=1100070 (log a request
online)

Dish Network
1-888-284-7116 (existing customers)
1-888-825-2557 (new customers)

http://www.dishnetwork.com/content/faq/index.shtml

Cable TV
Time Warner Cable Dallas (972) 742.5892 – three prompts
Cox Cable Las Vegas (702) 383.4000 – two prompts
Cox Cable San Diego (619) 263.9251 – one prompt, hit “0″
Time Warner Cable San Diego (858) 395.3220

Many of you have called your satellite provider, and your efforts have helped in
the early negotiations. This weekend is the first Utah and BYU football games
on the mtn., and it’s important to keep the pressure on the satellite providers.
A big push by our alumni and friends could lead to a quicker resolution.

In the short term, we understand the new broadcast partnership may be confusing
and not perfect for everyone. An undertaking of this magnitude will take some
time to work out the details. There have been, and will continue to be,
obstacles to overcome.

Looking at the big picture, we believe the new contract with CSTV/Comcast will
help elevate the Mountain West Conference and its institutions to new heights in
exposure, recruiting, national fan interest and success. As of Friday, Sept. 1,
the MWC is the only conference in America to have its own regional television
station. Distribution will come, but it may take some time and patience.Â

With your help we can make it happen.

Sincerely,

Dr. Chris Hill
Director of Athletics
University of Utah

Tom Holmoe
Director of Athletics
Brigham Young University

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August 31, 2006

Brad Rock’s A Ute Fan

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Brad Rock from the Desert News has compiled a fantastic list of interesting tidbits about BYU and Utah’s football teams. I’ve copied the list below for your perusal.

Take a look at the list of items for BYU:

• Did you know BYU defensive lineman Tyler Berry’s grandfather played professional basketball for the B.F. Goodrich Tiremen? I admit, I haven’t heard of them. But it must have been tough for opposing coaches to say with a straight face: “All right, men, go home and get some sleep. Tomorrow we have a big game against the Tiremen.”
Who’s up next, the Albertson’s Shelfstockers?

• Did you know freshman defensive lineman Brett Denney was recruited by Stanford and Harvard? Smart guy. I imagine while he’s crouching down before a snap, he’s actually figuring the answer to Poincare’s Conjecture. If you don’t know what that is, stop right there. You’re not smart enough to watch him play.

• Did you know junior linebacker Rex Doman is a cousin to former BYU quarterback Brandon Doman? So all he needs to do is beat Utah on the last drive of the game, lead the team to a 12-2 season and play in the NFL and nobody will make any unfair comparisons.

• Did you know junior defensive back Kellen Fowler is the son of former BYU quarterback Blaine Fowler? But until he can recite — verbatim — the entire script of “Caddyshack” like his dad, I won’t be impressed.

• Did you know junior offensive lineman Erik Freeman is a third cousin to former BYU star Bart Oates? Oates is the guy BYU pushed for all-America by mailing out envelopes with Quaker Oats inside. Does that mean if they want to promote Freeman, they’ll have to put little American flags in the envelopes?

• Did you know senior defensive back Aaron Gordon speaks English, Samoan, Tongan, Italian and Hualapai? That should come in handy if he ever wants to curse at the coaches.

• Speaking of cursing, did you know BYU has an offensive lineman named Nick Longshore? How convenient. When he gets hurt, he can curse like a longshoreman.

• Did you know junior wide receiver Troy Sheide is the son of former BYU quarterback Gary Sheide. So ex-QB’s Fowler and Sheide have sons playing for BYU. That’s nice, but what I’m really waiting for is Jim McMahon’s kid to show up.

• Did you know BYU has a defensive back named Tico Pringle? Just saying his name makes me hungry.

And here’s the list for the Utes:

Then there are the oddities about the Utes. For instance:

• Did you know 300-pound lineman Jason Boone comes from a family of 10 children? Do you ever wonder why people stop having kids when they’re one short of a team?

• Tight end Pate Moleni comes from a family of 11 kids — so they have a full complement of players. Wanna go for a kickoff unit?

• Freshman kicker Kepa Gaison’s full name is Bart-Jonah Iokepa Gaison. Or you can call him Notorious B.I.G. for short.

• The Utes have a player named Joe Giuliani and one named Joe Jiannoni, both linebackers. Which means, I guess, we can just call that part of the field “Little Italy.”

• Quarterback Brett Ratliff’s nickname is “Ratty.” You don’t want to see his apartment.

• Jason Voss, a 6-3, 268-pound tight end, showed dairy heifers in 4-H. Word is the judges kept pinning the blue ribbon on HIM.

• And finally, defensive back Mombroso Washington participated in Operation Iraqi Freedom. Imagine that — a player who understands the game against BYU really isn’t war after all.

I’d like to thank Brad for the entertaining list. However, just look at the list of tidbits. You can tell just by the length of the lists that he is obviously a Ute fan. Cut him he bleeds red…yada…yada…yada. I see right through you Brad. Next time just come out and say that you like the Utes and think their going to do better than BYU this season. So what if a few BYU fans can’t take your comments. At least give them the satisfaction of correcting you later. You’re not paid to make up “tidbits and idiosyncrasies.” You get free tickets to the games to give us water cooler fodder.

Oh! Don’t worry, I’ll be keeping this article for later in the season. When BYU has a great season going, I’ll write you and remind you how weak you were for not pointing out the obvious fact that BYU was going to have a great season. Maybe next time you’ll stop being afraid of BYU fans that are ALWAYS right.

P.S. The Jason Voss receiving the 4-H blue ribbon still has me laughing.